2017.2.15: My Date with God

2017.2.15: My Date with God

God, it doesn’t matter how much You give me. I’m still going to love You. It doesn’t matter how much you give me compared to others. It doesn’t matter God, if you give someone a billion dollars and you only give me a penny. It doesn’t matter how much you give me. I’m still going to love You. Your praise will always be on my lips. Even if you stop giving me. Even if you cut me off, God, what You have done for me is already so much for me. So much for us.

It doesn’t matter if I incur abuse from people, from people who love You or not. It doesn’t matter if they say things that hurt me. If they say things that are true but very painful to me. No matter what I do, no matter what happens, I’m still going to love You. Your praise will always be on my lips.

It doesn’t matter if people make me feel rejected. It doesn’t matter what people do to me or how I interpret it. I’m still going to love You to seek You, to at least try, to try my best. Your praise will always be on my lips.

And it doesn’t matter if people hurt me even more, when they say that I don’t love You, that I don’t really seek You that I don’t really love You. Well, God, I’m still going to love You, I’m still going to seek You. If I suck at loving You, at seeking You, then I’m still going to love You to seek You. Your praise will always be on my lips. Even if I’m going to hell, O Lord, I’m still going to love You and worship You and seek You for the rest of my life, at least try, but I’ll try to try my best, because I know You love me. I know You are the one true God. The God of heaven and earth. You will have your bride.

And God, I will still love those people. I will still try to love those who hate me, or who have hurt me, whether righteously or not. I will still love them, I will still pray for them, I will still bless them. That is the difference. They may curse they may attack me they may do anything to me even say that they love me that’s why they do these things to me. But God, help me not to take revenge. Help me to continue to bless them, to pray for them. To love them. Thank you God. To love your family, to love your people, to love all those that You have made.

If they tell me that me blessing them is actually more evidence that I hate them, then God, Your praise will always be on my lips. Then I will hug them, to love them, to kiss them out of love. To give them a fish, to give them what is good. Not to show off, but to show that I love them.

So God, regardless of what people do to me, regardless of what you give me, regardless of where I am compared to others, I will still try and try to try my best to love You and to seek You. Your praise will always be on my lips. If you take away my penny or what is worth my life and I die, then I will die still trying to love You and seek You. I will die a seeker.

So God, I thank You for giving me the ability to survive, to praise You, to worship You, to love others, and to pray and bless my enemies. If they want to kill me, I will not resist. I will put myself in Your hands. And if I die, I will die seeking You, I will die trying to love You. I will die an overcomer.

Thank you Lord, thank you Jesus.

And help me Lord, to continuously pray for those around me. I will raise a spiritual aura. I will raise a continual aura of prayer. Of blessings. Of You. Thank you Jesus. Thank you God. Give me strength.

And to add, it doesn’t matter if nobody reads my blog or not. It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter because I love God. It doesn’t matter as long as I try to seek You and love You. Thank you Jesus. Thank you God. Your praise will always be on my lips.

a-new-commandment
A new commandment I give you: Love one another as I have loved you. John 13:34

 

11/9/2016: My Date With God

11/9/2016: My Date With God

12:21am – 12:42am (but session continues)

Father, I love You, forgive me O God, forgive our sins. Jesus, it doesn’t matter who becomes the next president, what matters O God, is people follow You, what matters is people seek You. You are the God of mercy and grace, You are the God of second chances, You are the God of peace, You are the God of hope, You are the God of love, You are the God of everything good.

God, may You bless whoever becomes the next president, be it Hillary Clinton or Donald Trump. Bless that person, O God, that that person can seek You and listen to You and follow You. Lord, may You give that person wisdom and discernment. May You give that person the ability and the leaders of our country the ability to become great.

God, one thing that bothers me a lot is the treatment of prisoners. God, I have been there, and I know their hope, their chances. You are their only chance, You are their only hope. God can You please help them and Lord, may You use me someday to help them. Maybe my internship at Dismas Charities is not lost.

God, may You protect us. Protect those who are weak. Protect those who seek You. Father, teach us to love You. Teach us to worship You.

God, though You, nothing is impossible. Help me to live by faith. God, I’ve been making efforts to seek You more, to love You more. I know my weaknesses; I know my faults, but I am trying with the best of my knowledge and ability, to seek You more.

God, I thank You for today. I thank You for helping me resist sin and temptation. I thank You for helping me achieve what I needed to do, mostly. I thank You for inspiring me. I know, Lord, that I still sleep late and I still play late-night games, but God, I’m trying to make progress in that area.

God, our country needs You. It doesn’t matter what the results are. It doesn’t matter how much we have or don’t have. It doesn’t matter what other people or nations think. Our wound is great. Our wound is severe. And God, help us to seek healing.

You are the God that teaches us. Thank You Jesus. I go to sleep late but not in vain, at least, because I have chosen, at least partially, to seek You, and God, may You increase my space, my land, for You. Forgive me, O God.

Why do people suffer so much for You, I don’t really understand? Surely, they know You. They know You more than me. Why is it that I wait for the last minute before I seek You? Help me God, to seek You always.

God, You are good and You are holy. You are just. It should’ve been me, long time ago, but You, gave me mercy. It’s not easy for me to say this.

Father, if I die seeking You then my life is worth it. Thank you God for helping me in my life. Thank You God for healing me. Thank You God for giving me hope and a future.

God, teach us O Lord, and help us to overcome our flesh. Thank You Jesus, deliver us. [Session continues but will end transcribing]

Songs listened: (random music from my Favorites folder) Same Power- Jeremy Camp, I Must Tell Jesus- Hymn, Nothing Is Impossible- Planetshakers, The Prayer- Josh Groban, Should’ve Been Me- Citizen Way, [session continues but will end transcribing]

 

9/29/2013: I’m Back! and I will only be able to be back with God

9/29/2013: I’m Back! and I will only be able to be back with God

S: 11:50pm
E: 12:37am

[written]

I know I haven’t written an entry in about a month. Maybe I should write more often. I think one thing that is keeping me from writing is the fact that I can see how many views from other people in my blog. In this blog, this discovery, I hardly get any viewers and it discourages me from writing. Why should I write if nobody reads them? I know my motivation for writing should be because of myself. And I know that the greatest beneficiary of writing, personal writing, should be me.

[typed]

I know in this world, I can only trust God. God will always know and will always love while people can change their minds. I need God and other people to prosper but I only need God to survive. By surviving, I mean having eternal life and thus being alive. When this world is so cruel and injustice so prevalent, or when life is good, in both times, I can always talk to God who understands me. When people refuse to understand each other, when many people find enjoyment in hate, God gives me the wisdom and logic to counter them. When I lose, it is because I didn’t have God. When I win, it is because God is with me. And I count what other people see as a loss with God as a win. With God, I win.

I want to start writing more again. I want to increase my view count. I can try, but it is really God who makes me succeed. Thus, even though I want to increase my view count, I will try not to worry about it because part of the equation, or most of it, is out of my control. I will focus on what I can do. What I can do to increase my viewcount is to write regularly. So, I will try to write every Saturday for my readers.

I know whatever I do, and I think whatever people do, there will be people who disagree with me, and there are some people who want me to fail. I know one person who wants not just me but everyone human to fail is Satan. He tried to fail Adam and Eve from the beginning and, thanks to God, Adam and Eve prevailed.

There is a myth which states that people without many friends or connections or a good job have little influence in the world. That myth may be partially true, but in one context, it is wrong. Every Christian, regardless of who many friends or connections that person has, could be a powerhouse. A Christian is someone who loves God and if that Christian were to spend his time praying, he or she can move mountains. Some people may say that a Christian without “connections” or friends will be less powerful but I somewhat disagree. Relationship with God is more important that a Christian’s relationship with his or her friends. A good relationship with God gives the Christian spiritual power and the spirit is higher and stronger than the world. Other people may say that in order to have a good relationship with God, one needs to have a good relationship with people. That is somewhat true. The Bible tells believers to love God and to also love people. However, a good relationship with people and having many human friends are not the same thing. One can have many human friends not because of that person’s character but because of worldly traits such as wealth, prestige, power, etc. What matters is that the person is kind and loving to other people. As long as that person is kind and loving, no matter how few or how many friends that person has, he or she has a good relationship with people. But, we must not forget the Source. What makes a person kind and loving towards people? It is because that person is overwhelmed by the loving-kindness of God.

I can continue to write but I am trying to sleep at a semi-decent time. I have a prayer meeting from Intervarsity at 11pm and I want to go. I tried to go last week but I woke up at 11pm :(

8/26/2013: Strategy

8/26/2013: Strategy

S: 10:35pm
E: 11:38pm

[written]

I am trying or I want to write a journal entry for each day. There are a lot of things I want to write about but I will just write about things that are currently on my mind.

I need to sleep soon because tomorrow is my first day of the Social Work program.

I have a radar. Everyone has a radar. The radar tells each person where the most important things are or the priorities of life. I praise God that I have a (mostly) clear radar picture. I have a clear picture because I have wisdom that comes from God.

My life strategy, my niche is that of a tatictian. Different people have their own special niches and my advantage is that, while there is no concentration for me, I can apply it in my day-to-day life.

Seeing things and being able to do those things or tasks are two different things.

[typed]

In one way, I suck at seeing things. Things hit me before I see them coming. That is true of me when I was in basic training in the Army. I see other soldiers doing important things and I don’t understand why they are doing them. Or, I don’t get what my drill segearents teach me while everybody else understands. I have no eyes on my head. I lived day-by-day suffering the consequences of bad surprises.

I suck in the beginning because I did not lose enough before that. Losing can be a great teacher if the person seeks to understand why they have lost. I struggled and thought many times about why I have lost and I found that a recurring theme is that I lacked wisdom. So I asked God to give me wisdom, and not just wisdom, but also strength and courage because these were also reasons why I lost. I sometimes lose because I lack wisdom, other times because I lacked the strength, and still more times because I lacked courage. There are times when I lost and I don’t understand why. Then there are times I lost because I lacked patience.

I am still learning about life. I am still losing a lot. But once I understand why I lost, I can move forward. My current life strategy now is that of a general. I see things impartially and patienctly. I reexamine myself to see what tasks I may have missed. I problem-solve by talking to myself and to God a lot. I am hybrid, knowing that life cannot be inflexible. I live with a combination of logic and feeling knowing that both has its positives and can complement each other. The “feeling” part also includes intuition and instinct. I try to stay calm and aloof because I do not know many things and I need time to plan to make the best decisions. I also know that sometimes, I mean many times, I have to make choices quick, and with wisdom (my radar), I adjust accordingly.

However, I know there are factors outside my control that are negatively affecting me. My appearance, my inborn personality, and my abstinence from I would say popular culture. I do the best I can. I try to shine my color, my light. My favorite color is light-green so I try to shine a light-green light to people. I feel many times, I don’t emit any colors. I try to not show any light, any color.

In life, we must all try. We must all talk to ourselves and to God to be the best person that we can be. To be able to see as much as we could see.

There can be some pleasure in fighting a losing battle, a losing war. It can be a story of resistance. It can be a delay for the enemy. I am still fighting; I am still trying even through it seems like I’m attacked by multiple directions and without help. Even through it seems like I tried everything, tried everything to get help, but in the end, my outreach failed.

People may call me a loser, that I suck, and yet, when I try to imitate them, I reach a glass ceiling. What works for other people doesn’t seem to work for me. I lose even more when I try to become like them.

So I am going to practice hybrid warfare. I am going to live by both logic and reasoning, and also feeling and intuition. I will do my best to have the best radar and to plan and do everything by self-talk and self-talk with God.

That is how I can live. Though I feel like my land is in a desert, that I am cursed, my best strategy is not really a strategy, but of reevaluation and flexibility.

There are many people, angels, watching me. On clouds surrounding us. So, we should put aside the things that burden us and focus on Jesus. That is a Chinese Stream of Praise song that I am listening. So don’t give up or if you do because life is too hard, then fix the highest price for the enemy by fighting to your wits’ end.

6/25/2013: A lesson from my Mistake

6/25/2013: A lesson from my Mistake

S: 12:04am
E: 12:55am

Time is very short. In fact, I’m already overtime. For the record, this discovery will be for myself so it won’t interfere with my truthful writing.

To many of the youth members from my church, today (I mean yesterday), is a good day. They had BBQ, we got to socialize, and we watched Despicable Me. But for me, it is a horrible day because I didn’t follow God completely and it hurts to see my Christian brothers and sisters so into the world.

The best way; the perfect way, is to follow God completely. Everything else sucks. The pleasures this world gives suck. Yet, throughout the night, not one of the youths played Christian music, the music of eternal life and eternal value. All the music they played is “feel good” music. Feel good to what? Feel good to our human natures. Why is that bad? Because it is tainted by sin from the beginning. And we must be completely without sin to be with God. I know we can always ask for forgiveness and, depending on our hearts, He will forgive, but what is wrong is that I didn’t do my best. I should not worry that I might be kicked out or become a “party spoiler.” When the youths were watching Despicable Me, I should have closed my eyes and prayed silently. The movie doesn’t have any value because it doesn’t glorify God. Sure it’s funny, but Satan uses humor to change us to be evil.

I’m not really depressed by what they are doing, but by my inaction of it. I wasn’t courageous enough. I wasn’t watching with spiritual eyes enough. I wasn’t close to God enough. I’m also upset at myself because I didn’t pray for the youths or for the world enough. Not as much as I could.

And I made mistakes. People may be less forgiving but I’m glad God is more forgiving. I learned today though the Spirit that nothing else in this world matters. I should change myself again. I mean not really change but become, really become the person God wants me to be. I took the first step, by sharing my weaknesses and trying to be myself but I think it’s time I take the next one. I need to follow the fruits of the Spirit.

These youths.. they only (or so it seems) want what God gives them; they only want the blessings yet they don’t want the work that comes. They are more enthralled by the world than in God. They are basing their industries in the wrong thing. True, sometimes actually many times my old nature surfaces up like Paul, but what matters is that I vehemently try to follow God because I know deep inside that He is the only Thing that is worth it. Claire is different. She tries to follow God and ask questions. Anna too, but I feel she is half-world and half-God. She loves God but she also loves the world (the pleasures of the world, not people in the world).

Let these youths or other people judge me. My true purpose is the follow God. If I make mistakes trying to follow God then that’s okay. I just don’t want to make mistakes while not following God.

Because of this, maybe being with people is not such a good thing. Maybe I do have a point in saying I want to be alone and just talk to God. I be with people and I get overwhelmed by their lack of spiritual growth and their worldliness. I like how Uncle Allan said in church last Sunday. He said even though ex-President Bush made tons of mistakes, as long as he said he’s a Christian and tries to follow God, that’s okay. But President Obama is not sure of his spirituality. Allan and me doesn’t know where he stands. Does he follow God? Is he a Christian?

So, I want to change myself again. I want to be more meek, to be more humble, to have more peace, to be more patient. If things seem to be in a rush, I will slow down and not act rashly. God is in control and what is for us is greater than what is against us. If I’m driving in the car with Danny and Shawna and there is just silence because there is nothing good to say than I will just remain silent. Saying something just to break the silence is bad. God is the judge and everything I try to do is in accordance with the Bible. I will still love them. I need to be more self-controlled.

Sometimes I remember praying that I can have a “hot-line” to God. I tend to perform better spiritually at night. During the night, I feel I can talk to God much easier. The connection is stronger. I wish every day I can talk to God like I talk to a walkie-talkie.

If people question me and ask “Steven, what are you doing?” or “Why are you behaving like this?” I will tell them that I “want to be the person God wants me to be.” If they ask “How do you know what God wants you to be?” I will answer “Through his Word and though his Spirit that he gave me.”

Sometimes I wish bad things can happen to my youth members not to destroy them, but to build them up. After all, bad things happened to me in the Army and it helped me to grow.

I know by writing this and behaving like this I may lose many friends from church. But, if they love God, I’ll see them in heaven and we can be friends again.

I think what is the main difference between members of my youth group and me is not I have more wisdom or I behave better (or the other way around) or any other thing but simply because I try to follow God [more]. And the amount of our effort determines [the speed of] our spiritual growth. Course I mess up, course I get angry, and make mistakes, but as long as I try to follow the Lord, my stock in the stock market will be in an upward trend. Volatility doesn’t matter.

I want to try to do more in evangelism. I want to try to answer at least one spiritual or personal issue question from Yahoo! Answers once a day. I used to do that before but I stopped. It doesn’t matter if I will get less “best answers” or my percentage will go down. What matters is that I try to please God. If I suck in trying then oh well, I’ll try harder. I will either finish the race or die trying. I think that is what every Christian is supposed to do. Then we will have eternal life.

祂為愛來到世上
祂為愛走上十架
祂的愛改寫歷史
祂的愛重生了我

12/31/2012: My Reflection

12/31/2012:  My Reflection

{S: 10:42pm}  Traditionally, I write an end-of-the-year blog to reflect and summarize my life in that year.  I prefer to put this in writing first and then type it out but I am still working on myriads of undiscovered discoveries.  Frankly, I don’t really know what say except of something I thought of a few days earlier.  Before I continue, I want to write that I really don’t feel like writing.  My mind is disorganized and I feel I need to focus more on God.  But, I will do the best I can.  This will be like a forced march.

For my whole life, I have been struggling with how to live, and more specifically, on how to deal with people.  It occurred to me that I never really knew how to live with people.  I have a lot of preconceived notions about them and I am a loner most of my life.  Thus, many times when I deal with people, I get depressed, anxious, hopeless, irrational, and disturbed.  My old motto which I pray every day to God is “give me strength, give me courage, and above all, give me wisdom” helped a lot.  It allowed me to act properly thanks to wisdom from the Bible, which comes from God.  Through God’s wisdom, or a little bit of it, I am able to navigate the waters of personal relationships almost smoothly.  I want to add one, no I mean two, more ideas into this concoction.  The first is humility.  Though I understand it and know about it, I don’t really understand it and know about it.  I need to be humble in my interactions with others because our times are in God’s hands.  God is in control of everything.  What happens to us and our destiny is dependent on our relationship with God.  Joseph, in the book of Genesis, is dependent and follows God.  With that, it doesn’t matter what else he does because God’s plan for him, which is to save Egypt and his brothers and father from famine (Gen. 37:9), will be fulfilled no matter what.  God himself will make it happen because Joseph follows God’s will for his life.  He went from prison to second-in-command of Egypt, the most powerful nation in the world during that time.  I don’t need to be so self-conscious about what I will say or do.  I don’t need to worry so much about how I act in front of people to get the desired results.  The main thing I need to do is to do God’s will and He himself will fulfill it.  I just need to trust and follow Him.  The second reason to be humble is because God “gives grace to the humble” (Proverbs 3:34).

The last idea I want to add to that concoction is the thought that “as Christians, we should be optimistic because God has already won the war.”  Many times, I wallow in sadness and defeat.  When bad things come, when nobody loves me or care for me, I just sink into despair.  In that state, I make wrong choices.  But why should I be in this state?  Why should I feel defeated?  Christ has already won the victory.  Satan will be defeated.  It is foretold in the book of Revelation.  We can lose every battle but still win the war.  And actually, the battles that we think we lose on the outside, are actually victories if that person is fighting with God.  So, there is no reason for me to feel down or depressed when I “lose” a battle.  I should still be optimistic because I know what the final result will be.

Time is running out and I need to publish it before the deadline.  May I continue to grow and follow God in 2013.

{E: 11:53pm}

10/18/2012: 如果你想知道 / If You Want to Know

10/18/2012: 如果你想知道 / If You Want to Know

{S: 11:21pm} 你覺得愛是從哪裡來?  我好長的時間以為愛是從女生的, 以為愛是從我拿到一個A, 我 以為愛是從我採會有愛; 以為愛是從人來的.  感謝主我知道愛真得是從神來的.

雖然或是萬一沒有人愛我, 我知道神愛我因為愛是從神來的.

我知道我中文很爛, 我的英文有時候講得不好, 我的西班牙, 我跟門較不想講.  但是最首要是我對神好.

這首歌有感動我和給我希望.  神一直愛我涵愛永遠是從神邇來得. {E: 12:21am}

Translation:  Do you know where love comes from?  For the longest time, I thought love only comes from girls, or from getting an “A,” then I can feel loved.  I thought love comes from men.

Even if I feel no one loves me, I know that God loves me because love comes from God.

I know my Chinese sucks, I stutter when I speak English, my Spanish? I’m not even going to mention about it.  However, what really matters is I’m good with God.

This song touches me and gives me hope.  God will always love me and He loves with an everlasting love.

 

2/1/2011: Defense against Judgments

2/1/2011: Defense against Judgments

S: 9:51am

E: 11:28am (came back from formation)

Right now, I feel I’m on a low ebb on my writing skills. But, I still have to write. I write the good, I also need to write the bad times. Starkingdoms, the only game I allow myself to play, has been taking a lot of my time, but, at least it’s a lot more social than other games I’ve been playing. The leadership skills and practice in forums can help me grow as a person. Actually, I have been quite busy, between college, praying, doing military stuff, personal maintenance, and Star Kingdoms, and I find it hard to find time to write.

I’m also kind of forgetful sometimes. I was half-done on my other discovery I started but my mind then went blank. For me to write well, I need to be honest and write about my feelings and intentions before I write my content. I need to write about myself first before I write what I was planning to write.

For the past few weeks, I decided to socially isolate myself (esp. Facebook) because I needed to grow in God and self more. I’m afraid of people judging but I happy to say I have at last found a solution.

One thing that I find it hard in this world is judging. In my life, everyday, people judge me all the time, either intentionally or unintentionally. For example, when a soldier says, “Steven, wake up. Stop being lazy,” he is inferring:

Major premise: People who close their eyes during work are lazy.

Minor Premise: Steven is closing his eyes during work hours.

Conclusion: Therefore, Steven is lazy.

But, that is not the case. I did not close my eyes because I wanted to slack off and be lazy. No, the reason why I closed my eyes is so I can have the energy to do a better job. I chose to close my eyes because I know my weaknesses and I am trying to counter them.

This is why Jesus said in Matthew 7:1, “Do not judge, or you too will be judged.” God is right about that command because since God knows everything, only He can be the judge.

Before, my response is would be to argue and defend myself but I found the more I argue and defend myself, the more judgments and accusations I receive. Then, I tried to “be like Jesus,” by trying to know when to speak and when to remain silent. That helped, but, I think I found the best solution.

The solution is to, Steven, listen up, the solution to being judged is to be humble, truthful, and let your yes be yes and your no be no (Matthew 5:37). The truth will come in the end and God will be the ultimate judge.

I will do my best not to judge others but to pray for them. I cannot change people; only God can change people. I will be nice, caring, loving to everyone and I will also listen to my spirit as to when to speak and when to remain silent. However, if people judge me, I need to be humble, say the truth, and leave it to that. I will not go on explaining and defending myself. I will just let my “yes” be “yes” and my “no” be “no.” God knows the truth and He knows everything. He will be my real Judge.

PS: I have been so worried about being judged that I did not only isolate myself from Facebook, but also from my parents. I haven’t replied any of my dad’s e-mails this year nor have I called my mom in Taiwan. I always tell myself that I am not ready, that I am too stressed out to talk, but, I need not be afraid. God will be the Judge.

喜樂泉源 (Fountain of Joy) by 讚美之泉 (Stream of Praise)

祢是我喜樂泉源 祢使我歡欣跳躍
祢使我自由飛翔 不再被罪惡綁
祢是我永生盼望 祢愛有無比力量
從今時直到永遠 祢應許不會改變
祢的寶血 有能力 能醫治一切的傷口
祢的復活 能改變 一切的咒詛成為祝福
我們要高舉祢聖名 祢配得所有最大的讚美
我們要用全心 和全意 來敬拜祢
我們要歡迎祢來臨 願祢來設立寶座在這裡
我們要張開口 不停讚美祢

Fountain of Joy

For the past few days, I feel restless and uneasy. I find that by dancing and singing songs like this really cheered me up and helped me to give my burden to God. Hmm, when I get back to the States, I might sing this song along with my dance moves :)

It is Jesus who sets me free. I am so happy.

1/30/2011: Defense for the Egyptian People

1/30/2011: Defense for the Egyptian People

S: 2:49pm

E: 3:20pm

One thing that is bothering me a lot is the situation in Egypt. I cannot write to my full potential because I’m busy with Star Kingdoms and I’m off to play a Risk game soon, but I will spend lots and lots of time in prayer for the Egyptian people.

A dictator in power for 30 years refuses to listen to the people’s demands for him to step down. He has been accused of rigging elections, causing massive poverty, unemployment, violating human rights, and political corruption. And yet, he is still in power, why? Because President Hosni Mubarak is a key US ally. I see world dictators like Kim Jong Il or the late Saddam Hussein and I wonder why these evil people are still in power. Well, Hussein was eliminated due to US interests. After learning more about God, human nature, nations, and by watching the movie Zeitgeist (although I don’t agree with everything they say), I realized some world leaders are here and some are not because they depend on the interest of powerful nations.

I had a very innocent view of the United States. I thought they were the peacemakers, the global policeman, and a powerful force for human rights. But, not anymore. The Egyptian people are crying out against oppression just like the Hebrew slaves in the book of Exodus.

And he told them this parable: “The ground of a certain rich man produced a good crop. He thought to himself, ‘What shall I do? I have no place to store my crops.’“Then he said, ‘This is what I’ll do. I will tear down my barns and build bigger ones, and there I will store all my grain and my goods. And I’ll say to myself, “You have plenty of good things laid up for many years. Take life easy; eat, drink and be merry.”’“But God said to him, ‘You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?’“This is how it will be with anyone who stores up things for himself but is not rich toward God.” (Luke 12:16-21).

Hosni Mubarak is already blessed to be a ruler, yet, instead of serving God and people and helping the world, which is what rulers should do; he oppresses them and chose to “store up things for himself.”

The United States did not stop him because he cooperates with the US. The US fell to temptation and failed to uphold God’s moral standard. Because of this, the US is also guilty of oppressing people.

Proverbs 29:13 The poor man and the oppressor have this in common: The LORD gives sight to the eyes of both.

14 If a king judges the poor with fairness, his throne will always be secure.

America is guilty because the nation, which is so blessed by God, chose not to follow God but to follow herself. America chose self-preservation over God’s protection. She chose to trust in “horses and chariots” but not in the “name of the LORD [her] God” (Psalm 20:7). Look at Israel’s history. With God, 1 man can kill a thousand with a jawbone. With God, 300 men can defeat an army of 135,000. With God, all things are possible.

And this is why the Egyptian riots happened. This is why many other nations are challenging America’s status as a superpower.

 

Judges 2:20 Therefore the LORD was very angry with Israel and said, “Because this nation has violated the covenant that I laid down for their forefathers and has not listened to me,

21 I will no longer drive out before them any of the nations Joshua left when he died.

22 I will use them to test Israel and see whether they will keep the way of the LORD and walk in it as their forefathers did.”

When the Israelites violated God’s covenant by failing to follow God, He left a few enemies, namely the Philistines, to test them. And God is raising other nations to test us. Will America choose to follow God or to follow her own ways? Will she choose the way of life or the way of destruction?

1/29/2011: Bring people to God

1/29/2011: Bring people to God

S: 6:32am

E: 6:55am

Today, our battery played capture the flag for PT!!! I would have had more fun if I remembered one of the basic principles of evangelism.

I came to PT and my NCO told me the time and location of the first order of business for the day. I knew my NCO don’t like me asking questions, but, I wanted to know for what reason, so, I asked my best friend in the Army. He told me, with a “are you stupid” tone, the same thing my sergeant said. I asked why but he just ignored me. I went away but I felt hurt. I felt hurt because there is no love. I should have left it to that, if I knew that basic principle. However, I didn’t, so I decided try to share my feelings and try to change people.

I told him, “D, I don’t know why you are so mean. I just want to know for what reason (so I can prepare, but I didn’t say that).”

He replied, “Since you are so butt-hurt, don’t talk to me.”

My sergeant, who is in the vicinity, told me why do I want to know? Since I know my sergeant, I didn’t answer him but gave a “hooah sergeant.” Then I went away.

I thought about being completely rational with them but, no, I can’t. I still need to do Christ’s best to love people, even people who hurt me. Then our battery played capture the flag and I tried to be friendly with him. I had fun, and it was intense. I did what I can to help my team. I shout out every time an opponent cross the line (to prevent surprises). Since I see that most players either attack and on all the way or stay behind and defend, I played the role as a multi-fighter. I take defense first, and if I see most of the attacking teammates tagged, I go on “search and rescue” missions and go on the offense. Depending on the situation, I try not to put myself in great danger, so I can retreat and save my teammates again. I call myself the “rescuer.” Heh. Yea, our team won 3-2. Go 14 series :)

It is after the game, when walking to chow, that I remembered the basic principle of evangelism. I tried, without knowing, to change people, to bring God to people, but, as what Watchman Nee wrote, I need to bring people to God first before I bring God to people.

I find that I always try to change people’s behaviors, whether they are too mean, too judging, or too conceited. I find that I cannot change people. I cannot even change myself. None of us can. Only God can change people. I should not be trying to change behaviors or attitudes but to be praying and, with wisdom, leading people to God.

Luke 5:31 Jesus answered them, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick.

I remember my “Operation Los Angeles” and how much of the days I planned is in prayer. People need to seek God first. They have to have a need for a savior before they can accept Jesus into their hearts. Once that is done, God does the work of changing people. Then they become more loving, caring, patient, understanding, honest, etc. We should not worry about changing people’s outside behaviors or trying to change social issues like the economy, universal healthcare, or even abortion, because like an individual’s behavior, these are simply society’s behavior and beliefs. We need to bring people to God before we can bring God to people.

And also, before I take a dump and shower, I realized that my prayer life has been weak. I spent most of my time praying outside, when walking to and fro. I spent most of my time praying on my “junk” time. On my free time, in my room, I find that I spend a lot of time on Star Kingdoms (the only game I authorized myself to play) and college, but little on prayer. And the times that I do pray, I do something else also! I cannot do that! God says we cannot worship both God and money and that we have to love Him so much that everything else is like hatred compared to God (Matthew 6:24, Matthew 10:37). How dare me to add other things and concerns in my own time for Him! I need to repent and spend more time with Him. Without Him, I am nothing. I cannot be “too busy” (from Little Reflections) for God.