2017.2.15: My Date with God

2017.2.15: My Date with God

God, it doesn’t matter how much You give me. I’m still going to love You. It doesn’t matter how much you give me compared to others. It doesn’t matter God, if you give someone a billion dollars and you only give me a penny. It doesn’t matter how much you give me. I’m still going to love You. Your praise will always be on my lips. Even if you stop giving me. Even if you cut me off, God, what You have done for me is already so much for me. So much for us.

It doesn’t matter if I incur abuse from people, from people who love You or not. It doesn’t matter if they say things that hurt me. If they say things that are true but very painful to me. No matter what I do, no matter what happens, I’m still going to love You. Your praise will always be on my lips.

It doesn’t matter if people make me feel rejected. It doesn’t matter what people do to me or how I interpret it. I’m still going to love You to seek You, to at least try, to try my best. Your praise will always be on my lips.

And it doesn’t matter if people hurt me even more, when they say that I don’t love You, that I don’t really seek You that I don’t really love You. Well, God, I’m still going to love You, I’m still going to seek You. If I suck at loving You, at seeking You, then I’m still going to love You to seek You. Your praise will always be on my lips. Even if I’m going to hell, O Lord, I’m still going to love You and worship You and seek You for the rest of my life, at least try, but I’ll try to try my best, because I know You love me. I know You are the one true God. The God of heaven and earth. You will have your bride.

And God, I will still love those people. I will still try to love those who hate me, or who have hurt me, whether righteously or not. I will still love them, I will still pray for them, I will still bless them. That is the difference. They may curse they may attack me they may do anything to me even say that they love me that’s why they do these things to me. But God, help me not to take revenge. Help me to continue to bless them, to pray for them. To love them. Thank you God. To love your family, to love your people, to love all those that You have made.

If they tell me that me blessing them is actually more evidence that I hate them, then God, Your praise will always be on my lips. Then I will hug them, to love them, to kiss them out of love. To give them a fish, to give them what is good. Not to show off, but to show that I love them.

So God, regardless of what people do to me, regardless of what you give me, regardless of where I am compared to others, I will still try and try to try my best to love You and to seek You. Your praise will always be on my lips. If you take away my penny or what is worth my life and I die, then I will die still trying to love You and seek You. I will die a seeker.

So God, I thank You for giving me the ability to survive, to praise You, to worship You, to love others, and to pray and bless my enemies. If they want to kill me, I will not resist. I will put myself in Your hands. And if I die, I will die seeking You, I will die trying to love You. I will die an overcomer.

Thank you Lord, thank you Jesus.

And help me Lord, to continuously pray for those around me. I will raise a spiritual aura. I will raise a continual aura of prayer. Of blessings. Of You. Thank you Jesus. Thank you God. Give me strength.

And to add, it doesn’t matter if nobody reads my blog or not. It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter because I love God. It doesn’t matter as long as I try to seek You and love You. Thank you Jesus. Thank you God. Your praise will always be on my lips.

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A new commandment I give you: Love one another as I have loved you. John 13:34

 

11/29/2016: Helen-Class Cruiser

11/29/2016: Helen-Class Cruiser

5:08pm – 5:55pm  edited 10:03pm

Sometimes, in the war-games that I play, I liken my life in the spirit to a fleet of ships. How I seek Him, how I love Him, how I pursue and follow and obey Him, is reflected on the condition of my ships. When I am weak spiritually, my fleet is, naturally, very weak. However, there are other ships, and technologies from others, that I incorporate into my fleet to make it stronger.

Throughout my life, there have been people and organizations who, in the spirit, influenced me greatly, whom I admire, and whom I spent a lot of time with. Those people or groups may come through my life and leave, but the memories of them, the influence they have on me, is imprinted in my life for at least a very long time.

I admire those people or groups, and I begin to copy them, to emulate their strengths, their personalities, their desires and will, from what I know of them. I build a cruiser, a destroyer, using their technology. Some people and groups have stand-alone ships, some are incorporated into the rest of my fleet, and others have both.

In the Army, one of the people I admired spiritually was Endora. I saw her as someone who loves God, who has a passion, a deep love for Him. So I began to seek God using, to the best of my knowledge, of her worship to God. I jokingly told myself that I have an Endora-class cruiser.

Now, before I continue, I want to let everyone know that the root of all cruisers is God. The root of all Endora-class cruisers, Helen-class cruisers, Bethel technology, is God. To worship anyone else is idolatry. But each of us have different spiritual strengths of seeking Him and it is learning from others, of how they worship God, their mindset, their knowledge, their learnings, that I get to grow and enrich my experience with God and to help me to be closer to Him.

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Many times, when I struggle in my faith, it is those ships, those special classes of ships, that can effectively fight against the enemy. Just like in the Bible when God ordered that Judah go first to fight against his brother Benjamin, sometimes it is those ships, that go first to fight against the enemy, because the rest of my fleet, the ones mostly built by me, are too weak or they lack the weaponry that these other ships have.

When I’m weak in spirit, sometimes I think of other Christian heroes and they inspire me to continue or fight on.  The songs from Bethel, Hillsongs, and the many artists from K-Love, the preachings from Ignite, the leaders and disciples that I get to mingle and grow with, all gave me their influence, their technology, their knowledge and wisdom, their passion, their mindset, their reasons, to worship, love, and seek God.  I would not get far in my relationship with God if I were to just seek Him alone, using my own mindsets and technology.  As Christian brothers and sisters, we need to learn from each other, to share our discoveries with God, so we can collectively be empowered to fight against the enemy.

 

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